Y’all, I go to lots of movies.  You could even venture to say that I am a movie fanatic. Part of the full movie experience is what you get beforehand; for example, I get plain M&Ms and butter-free popcorn. Yet somehow all of the local movie theaters have stopped selling plain M&Ms!

All they have is pretzel and peanut M&Ms. Now, why would I want to eat pretzel M&Ms with my butter-free popcorn? That’s throwing the salty and sweet ratio off balance to where it is down right putrid! All I want is to be able to buy  my wonderfully boring candy at the theater, instead of having to drive to the local Walgreens to get it. Because sometimes we end up missing the previews! Which I highly look forward to, especially if I’m seeing a romantic comedy or if it’s at Alamo Drafthouse.

Maybe, the world has decided that it hates plain M&Ms or me…unlikely but still …or a new super villain is trying to take over the world but to power their electromagnetic wave gun and freeze guns they need all the plain M&Ms in the world! Otherwise, this super villain shall never be able to reek havoc among us civilians! This super villain can’t use the pretzel and peanut ones due to the fact  they end up melting the innocent (in some cases) victim instead…which is rather messy and it leads to a rather rancid odor. This scenario is much more likely.

I realize this is a very silly thing to be perturbed about, but y’all plain M&Ms are meant to be with popcorn. They’re food soul mates! All I want is to have my wonderfully boring M&Ms once more. Please.

Also, what the heck are Red Vines? Fake Twizzlers?